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DEALING WITH DIFFICULT CO-WORKERS

by Wendy Oliveras 19. October 2009 08:36

Have you ever worked with someone who made your day at work a living hell?  Well, I have and it was really difficult for me to want to come to work.  This co-worker was always in a bad mood, tardy, lazy, and hostile.  As a result, I felt stressed out and unhappy.  I remember asking myself, how can one person have such power over others and create such friction and toxicity in the workplace?  Luckily, however, this person moved to another state, so I did not have to leave my job.  But sometimes, there can even be more than one toxic co-worker.  So, what do you do?  The reality is that we all have flaws, and working with difficult co-workers is a commonality in the workplace.  The key is to identify the toxic co-worker(s).  Try to understand where this behavior comes from.  Although there is no excuse for anyone treating others with disrespect or creating unnecessary problems at work, the truth of the matter is that their personal problems consume them and they need help with coping with these issues. 

Let’s consider that there are many underlying reasons which create difficult co-workers.  Your concern should be on how that co-worker’s behavior is affecting you and what you can do about it.  Is it not true that happy people promote congeniality in their work environment, while unhappy people, whether intentional or not, create unnecessary difficult working relationships with others?  There are many people who just do not like to be told what or how to do their job.  The bottom line is that toxic co-worker(s) are detrimental to the growth of a company.

That said, working with difficult co-workers is a challenging effort, but there are some positive and proactive steps you can take in order to deal with this type of situation.

    Be professional about your response to a toxic co-worker(s).

    Be patient and try to understand that this negative behavior is coming from somewhere.

    Avoid confrontations as much as possible.

    Keep your cool!  Control your emotions and do not allow yourself to get caught up in unnecessary arguments or confrontations.  Remember that you are at work, and this is a place of business! 

    Be honest and speak to someone in human resources, your supervisor, manager, or upper management about what is occurring and how it is affecting you.  The good thing is that there are rules and regulations which management and human resources rely upon when dealing with such difficult employees.

    Depending on the circumstances, if things really get out of hand and you have exhausted all other measures to get help in handling this situation, then maybe you should either consider finding a more suitable place to work or speak to an attorney for advice in weighing your legal options.      

Regardless of where you work, however, you should never accept working in an uncomfortable or harmful environment.  Talk to your boss and identify the toxic co-worker(s), as well as describe how this negative behavior is affecting you, as well as others.  Don’t be afraid to express how this co-worker(s) is causing low moral and productivity in your department or office.  By not speaking up, you are only enabling and perpetuating the stressful circumstances that a difficult co-worker(s) can promote.       

  Wendy Oliveras is a search consultant and career planning and development advisor in Jersey City.  She can be reached at (201) 947-6662 or by email at wo@oliverascoinc.com.  For further information please visit www.oliverascoinc.com.

 


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